ch. 4: the horny
let’s hop off the wagon for a minute…
ya know, come to think….
Remember back in Ch. 1, when I told you I couldn’t remember the night before I wrote “Good Times”?…well, shit, maybe that’s when I wrote “Lower When I’m Sober”…
Speaking of “Good Times”…
here’s the unreleased music video:
midwest fable, ch. 4
christian name: randall rutledge
Goes By: Randy
Nicknames: Big Velvet, Rub-a-Dub-Dub, Randy the Rut
Birthplace: Mound Haven, Indiana
Prominent Features: Wandering eyes, Pointy antlers, Cloven hooves
Skills: Stripping bark, Blowing bubbles, Hopping fences, Running out into roadways at the last possible second
Midwest Fable: From the moment Randy dropped out of his mother, he had his nose in the air, checking the smells, looking for love - a real romantic even before he knew how. But growing up is a slow, tedious process. And often, those most anxious to find love have the most difficult time. Randy was never well-endowed, when it came to whitetail games - his antlers were small, and the few points he possessed we’re all angled awkwardly in different directions.
Years passed from childhood to adolescence to adulthood, yet Randy remained unremarkable. He’d snort and blow and sniff, and on the occasions he did find a suitable doe (which, let’s face it, was any doe he came across), there was always another buck, larger and highly ornamented, running him off and stealing his girl. Randy would hop away, find a small sapling and tear into it with frustration and longing.
The Fall after he turned 5, however, just when the “stirrings” began their crescendo into full on frenzy, Randy wandered into a creek bed and bent his neck over a still pool to drink. As he lowered his head, he barely recognized the reflection, for where a small and awkward rack once sat, grew a towering display of bone, spreading wide above his head, pointing heavenwards. His time had come. And he wouldn’t waste it.
Randy bound out of the creek, hopped fences, sprinted across fields, stopped, sniffed, snorted, took off again. He was a picture of reckless abandonment with one thing on his mind. He found a trail at the edge of a cornfield that led into the timber, and he charged in. Doe was near. He could sense her. He could smell her. He stopped. Raised his nose into the air. Grunted loudly and deeply. Then…something much louder. Confusion. The world swam. Blackness.
Where Is Randy Now?: Staring out across a cabin living room, watching some feller drink his morning coffee
Moral of the Midwest Fable: It’s okay to pursue your dreams, even passionately. But pursue them with a calm, determined and measured focus. Otherwise, in a reckless frenzy, you might lose your dream even before you find it.
tough times,
hard luck
I know. I feel bad for Randy too. But sometimes life is a bitch. All you can do is try to have fun with it.
personality test
Your time has come. Your fate awaits. Are you Good, Crooked, High, or Horny?
Take this test to find out:
(I’ll tell you my results at the bottom of this webpage)
so what are ya?
submit your test RESULT here:
(There’s no right or wrong answer & your result will remain anonymous - this is just for fun!)
Welp, I guess there’s only one question left to ask - Now that you’ve heard the album…
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OTHERWISE, IF YOU WANT TO BROWSE MORE ITEMS - including an entire line of official the good & the crooked products like bandanas, koozies, stickers & more - head to the MERCH STORE
As always though, regardless of whether you bought a darn thing, I want you to know how much I appreciate your support…that you cared enough just to show up today.
thank you!!!!
And before I go, I want to offer some very special thank yous to many people, including all you CROWD FUNDERS that came through on a dark hour to make this record happen in the first place. I don’t think I could say it any better than I did in the album liner notes, so I’m going to include that message here:
We’ve assembled, here in this record, eleven Midwest Fables, so to speak. But they’re only Midwest Fables because I wrote them with my own two feet firmly planted in Midwestern black dirt. They’re actually stories that could belong to anyone, anywhere, in any manner of dirt, concrete, river silt or golden pavement. They are characters, dramas, tragedies and hilarities inspired by the lives and the world around us. Around me, and I’d like to think, around you – The Stammily. Together, we are all manner of good, crooked, high, and certainly, horny.
This record is only mine – only this band’s – until it touches your ears. At that infinitesimal fraction of a moment, it becomes your record, as well. It becomes our record. And it is only here now, in your hands and in your ears (and, hopefully, soon in your hearts), because at a critical point in time, when the whole world shut down, the unstoppable power of community willed it to be so. You put your trust and your money in a record you’d never heard, because you believed in us. And that, my friend, is something I will never forget.
So my first, and most important, offering of thanks is to you. Thank you for giving these songs a home. Thank you to Dave, Jon & Bruce for the incredible amount of time spent secluded in rural Iowa rocking and rolling. Thanks to Luke Tweedy for all the frozen pizzas, and to Joe down in Nashville for working them volume knobs like a boss (because that’s all mixing is, right?). And my friend, Randy Leroy, you truly are the Master. I’d also like to thank the Janson family –Paula, Reid & Who-the-Fuck-is-Rodney – for being the first to enthusiastically encourage and support the Crowd Fund Campaign that got this record out on time. Remember folks, sometimes, all it takes is a text message of encouragement to pull someone out of a dark place. To Steve Grubb, for wishing Sheila a Happy Birthday that will be around for as long as this album (and to Sheila, for being the kind of classy gal who would appreciate such a gift). Thanks to Bob Robertson and Central Illinois LINE-X for being in our corner for two years straight now. Charlie & Cindy Roberts, my good friends from out Indiana way, I’m so glad to have met ya this last year. Your support is an inspiration. Speaking of support, I don’t think I can begin to measure what Joshua & Kimberly Shumaker have been for us. Your family is beautiful. Your story is uniquely beautiful. You’re beautiful. Also, I’ve gotta thank Jake and Spencer Wilson, Michelle Zeller, Charles and Brandi Klughart, and Katy Skaggs (Katy, the next Busch N/A is on me), for inviting me into your homes when I have little to offer but my music and my charm. And as always, Laurie Donlan and the good folks at Last Chance Bar & Grill, we love you. And we love your breakfast.
Alas, we come to the most important thank you – my best friend and favorite person in life, Elise Kingland, who, incidentally, is also my graphic designer and the owner of Blue Heron Graphic Design. Thanks for enduring my persistence, perfectionism, moodiness, and a thousand other imperfections. Thank you for refining my ideas, bringing me down to earth, and creating beautiful art (and once again, sorry this section is so long…you’ll figure out how to fit it all in, right?).
And back to YOU – enjoy this record. Enjoy these stories. They are yours. And hey, let’s hang out soon.
Joe
ps: my personality test result was “good”
(Yeah, I don’t know - that’s just what it said :)
album credits
Vocals, Guitar & Shotgun: Joe Stamm
Lead Guitar, Keys & BG Vocals: Dave Glover
Bass, Keys & BG Vocals: Jonathan Byler Dann
Drums, Percussion & BG Vocals: Bruce Moser
Piano (& Some Organ): Dave Zollo
Boing Sound: Luke Tweedy
Produced by Joe Stamm & Dave Glover
Recorded by Luke Tweedy at Flat Black Studios in Iowa
Mixed by Joe Carrell at Treasure Isle Recorders, Nashville, TN
Assisted by Leah Schattschneider
Mastered by Randy Leroy at Tonal Park, Washington D.C.
All songs written by Joe Stamm
Graphic Design & Artwork by Elise Kingland at Blue Heron Graphic Design
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